Elle Milewski

OPENING SCENE -- Introduces primary protagonist; introduces setting; provides important information for end of the novel; sets up Inciting Incident Opening Scene | Sample.pdf

1.) The Act of Story Statement Stop her violent thoughts from manifesting in reality before they can do irreversible damage. 2.) Antagonist/Antagonistic Force The primary antagonistic force in The Fog Descends is Leila Howard’s own thoughts. From the moment we meet Leila, the violent thoughts that are product of her OCD are the power that stands between her and peace. When her father dies, this force explodes in magnitude as her thoughts begin to actually affect the physical world, causing irreversible harm. Jamie Franklin provides another antagonistic presence. Though Leila and Jamie wouldn’t necessarily be categorized as antagonists by themselves, they become each other’s antagonists upon meeting. Leila’s abilities short-circuit Jamie’s fact-driven mind and she becomes the obstacle that stands between him and his ability to cope with reality. Meanwhile, Leila desperately needs someone to believe her, show her kindness, and help her escape the torments of her mind. However, Jamie’s cold treatment of Leila leads him to become a major obstacle to her healing. 3.) Breakout Title The Fog Descends 4.) Comparable Titles In Excess of Dark visits Midnight Mass while paying fiery homage to Carrie. 5.) Logline When a young woman’s violent thoughts begin physically manifesting in reality, she confides in a man whose desperation for understanding and hunger for control will put countless lives at risk and leave her more dangerous than ever. 6.) Conditions of Inner Conflict INNER CONFLICT Internal conflict is the dark heart of this story. Since this story is told from two POVs, there are two driving internal conflicts: Leila Howard – Intrusive, violent thoughts have plagued Leila’s entire life, eating away at her psyche until, at a tragically young age, she stopped believing she was a good person. Upon being diagnosed with OCD, Leila learns to cope with her pain, motivated by the knowledge that she is not alone and that they “are just thoughts.” When her father is killed, everything changes. The depth of Leila’s grief unleashes a power within her that causes her greatest fear to come true: her intrusive thoughts begin physically manifesting in reality. As Leila becomes a danger to everyone in her life, she is slowly torn apart by the undeniable fact that she isn’t experiencing the nightmare: she is the nightmare. Jamie Franklin – Jamie’s childhood has left him obsessed with control and understanding. He believes that people are nothing more than concoctions of chemicals and has spent his career as a psychiatrist fueled by the knowledge that there is always an explanation. However, when he encounters a patient who displays abilities he cannot comprehend, his worldview teeters on the edge and he desperately attempts to keep it from plummeting. Hypothetical Scenario (Leila) – On the night of her father’s funeral, Leila’s thoughts physically alter reality for the first time. As her drunk mother stumbles away, Leila is overcome by grief, anger, and abandonment. Suddenly, a “fog descends” and reality is replaced by a terrible image. Pain and heat engulf her mind and even as she can feel her body stationary on the couch, she watches a horrific scene unfold that leaves her mother hospitalized. Hypothetical Scenario (Jamie) – While trying to acclimate to the small town of Citrine, Colorado, Jamie decides to attend service at Saint Peter’s Church of All Faith: the local church with an infamous history. During the service, the young pastor sermonizes that “knowledge could not expand without darkness to expand into.” The very reminder that there are things in the world beyond comprehension triggers Jamie, causing him to flee the church as he remembers the patient whom he could not save. SECONDARY CONFLICT The secondary conflict is the relationship between Jamie and Leila. While they both share the same goal of putting a stop to Leila’s preternatural abilities, the inherent conflict between their motivations gives rise to dangerous resentment. Leila is living proof of something beyond comprehension, which is Jamie’s greatest fear, while Jamie’s cold treatment of Leila as some terrible mistake only fuels her violence and anguish. Hypothetical Scenario – Jamie is convinced that if he is able to see Leila’s brain activity, he will be able to understand her “episodes” and diagnosis her “illness.” He pulls strings and juggles lies in order to gain use of an fMRI machine at the hospital. When the scan shows brain activity that is utterly impossible, Jamie confronts the doctor and is left humiliated. After dragging Leila from the hospital, Jamie speeds down the mountain roads that claimed the life of Leila’s father, and Leila breaks down in tears, asking Jamie why he didn’t just stay away from her in the first place if he hated her this much. Jamie responds with a heart-wrenching blow: “staying away would not have changed your existence. And that is the problem here.” 7.) The Incredible Importance of Setting Citrine, Colorado is the epitome of a small town: insignificant to the world, yet so full, it is its own world. With a population of just under 3,000, Citrine rests on the shore of Lake Stephen, a magnificent body of water, cradled within the mountains. Citrine’s Main Street spans only four blocks. Some of the storefronts and restaurants are reminiscent of other places and times: the town’s only club could have been designed by Gatsby himself; the bizarre surf shop looks like a misplaced piece of California; the cozy Irish Pub could be in the highlands; and the local coffee shop’s twinkling lights and fresh French pastries invoke dreams of Paris. Other buildings are pure Citrine: The small antique shop; Sam’s Hardware Store; The Old Theatre and it’s burnt out marquee; the strangely elegant and well-kept Town Hall; and the white Oak walls of Saint Peter’s Church of All Faith, the town’s infamous place of worship. While Citrine used to be a summer tourist destination for families living in Denver and Colorado Springs, it now has more past than future. The commercial hotels on the outskirts of town have been shut down and scheduled for demolition and an entire block of storefronts sits boarded-up and abandoned. Everything that remains – though still charming – has an underlying sense of decline. But the part of Citrine that reeks strongest of decay are the very roads that lead in and out of town. Tormented by the harsh winters, the cement has been left fractured, split open, and covered with potholes the size of craters. During the harshest days of winter, the roads are often left untreated, becoming so treacherous that the town becomes inaccessible for 24-72 hours at a time. No one goes in. No one gets out. Luckily, there is a bigger town called Fayetteville just 12-miles away (though the twisting, winding roads make it feel much further). Fayetteville is a familiar suburban sprawl. Many residents in Citrine work in Fayetteville and rely on it for everything from grocery shopping to getting their teeth cleaned. Citrine’s heartbeat is slowing, and Fayetteville is like it’s pacemaker: providing enough support to keep the small town running. Except, that is, during those periods in the dead of winter, when Citrine is truly on its own.