Jump to content

Kimberly Luse

Members
  • Posts

    3
  • Joined

  • Last visited

Posts posted by Kimberly Luse

  1. CHAPTER I

    The tap, tap, tap, of the red Louboutin stilettos echoed like jacketed hollow point rounds being fired from a suppressed SIG Sauer P365, as she walked confidently across the polished, dove grey, Italian marble floors of her opulent office space to stare out the 25th floor window.  It was a sound the man just entering the room, one that owned such a weapon, was well familiar with. 

    The heels were an exact color match to the well fitted, powerful, yet feminine, fitted tank dress Eve wore flattering her flawless figure. Her black silken hair was swept up in a beautiful chignon held by a diamond tipped pin.  The perfectly French manicured index finger of her right hand tapped in a contemplative rhythm on the nearly empty wine glass she held.

    There was nothing to see out the window, except the night sky, the blinking lights of the city and those of airplanes taking off and landing at LAX.  But her gaze rested with unfocused eyes on life bustling below.

    “We have found her ma’am,” Blaise Trenton said from behind her. His deep, silken tone drew Eve from her moment of quiet consideration and caused her to resurface into the sea of tension that had been surrounding her for months.

    Eve turned from the window toward the tall, handsome, yet formidable man standing in the center of the office with a weak smile and a resigned look and replied softly, “that’s excellent work.  Thank you for letting me know.”   

    Surprised at the lack of any change in her demeanor with such good news, Blaise assessed the woman before him more closely and noticed a palpable, ominous, unnamable tension rolling off her in waves akin to an angry ocean. 

    The power of it caused his otherwise indominable countenance to waiver slightly.  Clearing his throat, he asked, “what are your wishes?” 

    After another moment of silence and another 'not quite' smile, Eve replied, “I want her watched, but I think we should let her have at least a few more days of freedom before we tell her.  We won’t be the only ones that have been looking for her.”

    “As you wish.  I will put a detail on her until you give me the go ahead to bring her to you,” Blaise assured her with a nearly indiscernible bow of his head as he backed away from her toward the office door. 

    “Oh, and Blaise,” Eve said as she returned to gaze out the window, halting his egress.  “See that she has an enjoyable time until we take her.”

    Another brief nod, acknowledging Eve’s meaning, as she made eye contact with his reflection in the window before her gaze once again became vacant, was followed by a soft click a moment later as he left the room and closed the door behind him.

    There was a motive for every decision Eve made and Blaise knew it.  A smile curled onto his sultry lips as he made his way to the elevator.  The thrum of excitement beginning to fill his chest made each step more deliberate and pronounced.  Entertaining a beautiful woman had been one of his favorite things to do for over seven hundred years.  But it never got old!  And now, a Daughter of Eve?  Unbelievable!

    After a tug on both lapels of his jacket and a touch to check both cuff links, he continued toward the elevator.  It occurred to him that being the oldest son of the monarch of the Vampire Hegemony had certain benefits.  Good looks and charisma were nearly always inherent in his species, but his station afforded him a certain amount of automatic respect and power.  It was also his responsibility to be the emissary to the Goddess, Eve.  He didn’t mind that either.  She had always treated him well, but she was becoming more unpredictable and maybe somewhat more unstable in recent decades as her search for the Core Stone now seemed more frantic than before.

    The elevator door swished open. “I want a detail on her immediately.  I want to know where she goes, when she goes there, and what the best opportunity might be for me to coincidentally make her acquaintance,” Blaise said into his cell phone as he stepped onto the elevator and the doors softly hissed closed behind him. Returning his phone to his inside jacket pocket, Blaise dropped automatically into the power stance one would expect from a man of his station and power.  Only the slight upturned corner of one side of his mouth told of the difficulty he had maintaining a calm exterior when the eagerness he felt on the inside made him want to fist pump.

  2. FIRST ASSIGNMENT: write your story statement. 

    48-year-old Eliza Heaton discovers she is the most recent, yet unlikely incarnation of Eve from Garden of Eden fame and is destined to follow the steps of an ancient prophesy that has her running for her life to break the blood lust curse placed on Eve’s first son Cain, the casting of which made him the first vampire.  Gifted with the Book of Eve by a sentinel angel, which contains the journaling of all of the previous incarnations of Eve, Eliza has to decipher the prophesy and find courage and discipline deep within herself while eluding rogue vampires, vampire hunters and the Catholic church who would see her efforts fail for their own gain.

      

    SECOND ASSIGNMENT: in 200 words or less, sketch the antagonist or antagonistic force in your story. Keep in mind their goals, their background, and the ways they react to the world about them.

    There are multiple antagonists based on plots, subplots, and mission goals.  Eliza is twice divorced, has two adult children whom she is determined to keep safe and now has to partner with the prince of the modern-day vampire kingdom to free an entire race of beings she was unaware existed before she found out who she really was.  There are factions of the vampire nation that want nothing to do with removing the curse that makes them the powerful, nearly immortal creataures they are and will stop at nothing to make sure the prophesy is never fulfilled.

    The Catholic church has its own secret reasons for wanting vampires to remain in the world. 

    Vampire hunters are descended from Seth, the supposed victim of Cain’s heinous crime.  Their purpose is to balance the scales of karma and to do so, there have to be vampires to hunt and kill.

    A female vampire, Lila, has her sights set on remaining a vampire and becoming the vampire prince’s queen and will therefore do her worst to ensure those loyal to the crown do not succeed. 

     

    THIRD ASSIGNMENT: create a breakout title (list several options, not more than three, and revisit to edit as needed).

    Title 1:  Suddenly Immortal

    Title 2: Why Me?

    Title 3:  Be Careful What You Wish For

     

     FOURTH ASSIGNMENT: - Read this NWOE article on comparables then return here.

    - Develop two smart comparables for your novel. This is a good opportunity to immerse yourself in your chosen genre. Who compares to you? And why?

    My book, Suddenly Immortal, is the first book in a trilogy entitled The Daughters of Eve.  It can most closely be compared to The Southern Vampire Mysteries by Charlain Harris.  These are the books that the series True Blood was based on.  Both stories feature a strong female protagonist that evolves as the story progresses.  Snooky in True Blood was shocked by the existence of vampires but quickly warmed to them not just as a species, but as a romantic entanglement.  She joined in with the goals of these deadly beings and found human-like features about them to love.  Likewise, Eliza, my protagonist had never considered the existence of vampires and is now engaged in a life and death struggle to free them from an ancient curse as well as being romantically drawn to the vampire prince.

    As the trilogy advances, there are also elements of the adventure in Journey to The Center Of the Earth by Jules Verne as the unlikely team of humans and vampires travel to several exotic places in search of the keys to unlock the curse.  Our heroes must travel to the Middle East to locate the original Garden of Eden to perform an ancient ritual and subsequently to Iceland searching for the portal into Vortex where all possibilities exist.    

     But this first book is more like the flavor of the early works of the Southern Vampire Mysteries.

     

    FIFTH ASSIGNMENT: write your own hook line (logline) with conflict and core wound following the format above. Though you may not have one now, keep in mind this is a great developmental tool. In other words, you best begin focusing on this if you're serious about commercial publication.

    Eliza has become disquieted with her vanilla life and as a result accepts the challenge posed to her by Uriel the sentinel angel as he discloses her immortal nature to her and delivers the ancient text known as the Book of Eve.  While rational, levelheaded Eliza would never become involved in anything that would put her and her children in such mortal danger, the Eliza who sees middle age ready to plunge her into the depths of obscurity, decides to move in a direction of danger, intrigue and romance that has her rushing to catch up with her own evolving spirit.  She becomes entrenched in the stories she reads from the Book of Eve and longs to make a difference in the world like her sisters before her.  Hers may be the ultimate sacrifice, but Eliza has come to terms with that and is willing to take the risk.  Will she be able to find the elusive, deep, passionate love she seeks before her deestiny takes her life?

     

     SIXTH ASSIGNMENT: sketch out the conditions for the inner conflict your protagonist will have. Why will they feel in turmoil? Conflicted? Anxious? Sketch out one hypothetical scenario in the story wherein this would be the case--consider the trigger and the reaction.

     Next, likewise sketch a hypothetical scenario for the "secondary conflict" involving the social environment. Will this involve family? Friends? Associates? What is the nature of it?

    Eliza is on a quiet journey of self-discovery searching for her life’s meaning when she is immersed in a deadly adventure that could have a monumental impact on the world.  Her children are at risk, and she has to trust people she doesn’t know to keep them safe while she focuses on unwinding the mystery behind the prophecy she is meant to fulfil. 

    Eliza has a history of broken relationships and is reluctant to become involved with anyone, especially when she doesn’t know if she will survive her current situation.  But an overwhelming pull from an unlikely man pulls her deep into a love that she has always craved. 

     

     FINAL ASSIGNMENT: sketch out your setting in detail. What makes it interesting enough, scene by scene, to allow for uniqueness and cinema in your narrative and story? Please don't simply repeat what you already have which may well be too quiet. You can change it. That's why you're here! Start now. Imagination is your best friend and be aggressive with it.

     

    The action in this first book takes place in modern times between Santa Barbara, and Oxnard, California.  Eliza’s home is in Santa Barbara where she has accepted employment after her most recent failed marriage.  New place, fresh start.  That is what Eliza hopes to find.  However, as she looks around her home, she sees the same muted color scheme that she has always chosen.  Safe, neutral beiges and tans.  Her home is described in enough detail for the reader to find themselves comfortably at home in her surroundings but to also feel the safety, bordering on boredom she has always chosen for herself.   The reader would be able to visualize the floorplan and energy of her home surroundings so that the subsequent action sequences make sense. 

    After Eliza’s home is destroyed in an explosion perpetrated by a battle between rogue vampires and the angels set to guard her, she and her new partner in this adventure are swept away by his security detail to the Vampire Prince’s home in Oxnard, California for a brief stopover.  It is in stark contrast to Eliza’s simple surroundings with opulence, color, and security unlike anything Eliza has ever experienced.  Even this fortress proves to be unsafe for the group, however, and they must quickly follow the clues in the Book of Eve and embark on their journey to locate the original Garden of Eden to perform the ritual described in its pages.

×
×
  • Create New...